Mr. Smarty Pants

Grok Headline matches for Mr. Smarty Pants

Smarty pants!

Smarty pants! 05/14/2004 01:26 PM
Where do you live, among a bastion of geeks, or sea of academia-phobes? US Census released the smartest cities, states, and counties with Seattle and Raleigh topping the cities. Also for those who are politically curious, of the top 15 states with Bachelor degrees 11 went to Gore, while 13 of the bottom 15 went to Bush.

Big and Tall World: Free Shipping and
Tshirt with Every Order*. Big and Tall
Store Shop Big Daddy Big and Tall Dress
Shirts, TShirts, Sweat Shirts, Dazzle
Shorts, Jeans, Camouflage, Fleece, Sweat
Pants, Gym Pants, Belts,
Socks,Underwear, Belts, Pajama

Big and Tall World: Free Shipping and
Tshirt with Every Order*. Big and Tall
Store Shop Big Daddy Big and Tall Dress
Shirts, TShirts, Sweat Shirts, Dazzle
Shorts, Jeans, Camouflage, Fleece, Sweat
Pants, Gym Pants, Belts,
Socks,Underwear, Belts, Pajama 04/22/2004 05:17 AM
Big and Tall World

bigandtallworld.com
track this site | 2 links

Gun of the Pants

Gun of the Pants 12/28/2004 04:53 PM
You can't blame TV on rampant family sex abuse among the Amish. "Mary was grabbed in the bedroom, in the barn, in the outhouse, milking the cows in the morning, and on her way to school."

Pants-fu

Pants-fu 11/19/2003 10:34 AM
A pixelated stencil icon graffiti I saw on a telephone switch box when I was returning from the Posti...

NES Controller Hot Pants

NES Controller Hot Pants 08/23/2004 08:53 AM

Nintendo Hotpants: Because It's Ever So Hard To Get a Nerd Into Bed. Available at your local Hot Topic, these hot pants are completely sold out online. Too bad Nintendo has never made a wireless controller that vibrates.

Read - Catalog Page [HotTopic via TheRawFeed]

I'm Not Wearing Any Pants

I'm Not Wearing Any Pants 10/28/2003 11:09 PM
Okay, things have been way too friggin' crazy lately. It's time to take off my trousers and celebrate a long-overdue, pointless, pantless day. Yes, No Pants Friday is in full effect. If you don't join me, I'm sending Sprocket to your house to hump your leg. Should I go as far as to prove it to the world? Well, so as not to drive traffic away immediately, check out my iSight by clicking the regular cam thumbnail over there in the sidebar. Let your hair down and just enjoy my tighty whities for a few minutes. But not for too long because... well, that's just freaky, dude....

No Pants Day 2003 is May 2nd

No Pants Day 2003 is May 2nd 05/06/2004 09:57 PM
No Pants Day 2004 is Friday, May 7th .. [-La web del "dia sin pantalones"] .. a holiday

nopantsday.com
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Party in My Pants

Party in My Pants 03/08/2004 11:23 PM
I'll admit it. There are nights that I want to feel "a little special, naughty, and very sexy." But I'm not clear on how a pair of size 34 Minnie Mouse underpants makes that happen. (03-04)

It's like the broadcast flag... in your
pants!

It's like the broadcast flag... in your
pants! 12/02/2003 01:52 AM

"Does Madonna have the right to tell you how to dispose of your jeans? From the way Time Warner, the Gap stores, and eBay are acting, you'd think she does."

-- from the strange tale of not being allowed to sell a CD the Gap gave away to you.

Oops, I Crapped My Pants

Oops, I Crapped My Pants 01/04/2004 06:59 PM
After meeting the author of 'Atlantis, Alien Visitation and Genetic Manipulation' (and subsequently reading it), I've embarked on an intellectual journey that's been... strange, to say the least. As noted in a recent post, I've been diving into similar writings that explore the idea that humans are actually extraterrestrial hybrids. Before you dismiss the idea outright, you might care to question all the unanswered questions. I personally believe that there's intelligent life out there - and that's exactly why it's choosing not to reveal itself to us outright. Some say Niburu is coming, others say that Planet X is nothing more than bad astronomy. Have YOU ever had a close encounter of the weird kind?...

"caught with his pants down around his
ankles."

"caught with his pants down around his
ankles." 07/20/2004 02:40 PM

Suing the Pants Off Spammers

Suing the Pants Off Spammers 05/12/2004 05:46 AM
Wired magazine asks Les Seagraves, EarthLink's chief privacy officer, about the wisdom of doing battle against spammers in court.

Fancy-pants President

Fancy-pants President 07/13/2004 12:01 PM
"Is [President] Bush a Homo?" Those are Betty's words... not mine. [via tinmanic]

Louisiana May Ban Low-Slung Pants (AP)

Louisiana May Ban Low-Slung Pants (AP) 04/23/2004 06:39 AM
AP - People who wear low-slung pants that expose skin or "intimate clothing" would face a fine of up to $500 and possible jail time under a bill filed by a Jefferson Parish lawmaker.

Louisiana may ban low-slung pants

Louisiana may ban low-slung pants 04/23/2004 09:40 AM

Take my advice, or I'll spank you
without pants.

Take my advice, or I'll spank you
without pants. 10/28/2003 11:08 PM
A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries, and other actual Hong Kong film subtitles. T-shirts , too. How can you use my intestines as a gift?

Man Jailed for Dropping Pants in Court
(AP)

Man Jailed for Dropping Pants in Court
(AP) 06/24/2004 04:11 PM
AP - A man has been jailed for six months on a contempt charge after dropping his pants and mooning a judge. Richard Brown, 38, as jailed Wednesday after an outburst in front of Superior Court Judge Patrick Carroll.

Damnit, I left my PC in my other pair of
pants...

Damnit, I left my PC in my other pair of
pants... 03/08/2004 11:04 PM
Pen Drive: The Road Warrior's Guide - carry a word processor, spreadsheet, email client and more, all in your pocket.

Tenn. Man Arrested After Changing Pants
(AP)

Tenn. Man Arrested After Changing Pants
(AP) 04/15/2004 06:31 PM
AP - It was a case of being in the wrong pants at the wrong time. Kendrick Gibson, 26, was arrested by police Thursday after failing to surrender himself for booking on a misdemeanor citation for a suspended license charge.

There's a movie in your pants, uh,
jeans, er...nevermind

There's a movie in your pants, uh,
jeans, er...nevermind 01/16/2004 10:57 AM
The first mention of the sequence GATTACA in the human genome is 14109 characters in. It will be several decades before science is able to...

Man Admits Stuffing Shrimp Into Pants
(AP)

Man Admits Stuffing Shrimp Into Pants
(AP) 01/22/2004 02:10 AM
AP - A man pleaded guilty to retail theft for allegedly stuffing $73 worth of shrimp down his pants at a grocery store and then fleeing from the store without paying.

La. House Rejects Ban on Low-Slung Pants
(AP)

La. House Rejects Ban on Low-Slung Pants
(AP) 05/26/2004 03:02 PM
AP - The fashion police won't be coming to Louisiana. State lawmakers refused to make it a crime to wear low-slung pants in public that expose "undergarments or ... any portion of the pubic hair, cleft of the buttocks or genitals."

Mayor says don't air your pants in
public (Reuters)

Mayor says don't air your pants in
public (Reuters) 07/27/2004 04:06 AM
Reuters - Drying wet laundry in public will earn residents of Cyprus' capital Nicosia a fine later this year as authorities launch a drive to clean up the city's image, its mayor has said.

Louisiana Bill Would Ban Low-Slung Pants
(AP)

Louisiana Bill Would Ban Low-Slung Pants
(AP) 05/13/2004 04:46 PM
AP - A Louisiana state representative wants to make it illegal for people to wear low-slung pants that expose underwear — or more. But he's having trouble getting some of his colleagues to take him seriously.

Say it Ain't So, Smarty

Say it Ain't So, Smarty 06/07/2004 12:09 PM
Belmont Stakes turned out impressive results, despite the outcome.

Yahoo! News - Louisiana May Ban
Low-Slung Pants

Yahoo! News - Louisiana May Ban
Low-Slung Pants 04/24/2004 07:27 AM
Yahoo! News - Louisiana May Ban Low-Slung Pants .. this bit of news

story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&e=8&u=/ap/20040423 /ap_on_fe_st/pants_too_low_2
track this site | 5 links

Dad Says School Duct-Taped Son's Pants
(AP)

Dad Says School Duct-Taped Son's Pants
(AP) 09/22/2004 04:27 PM
AP - An outraged father of a seventh-grader says an assistant principal duct-taped his son's pants to keep them from sagging then sent him back to class.

Police Catch 80 Revelers with Pants Down
(Reuters)

Police Catch 80 Revelers with Pants Down
(Reuters) 08/31/2004 10:13 AM
Reuters - Around 80 men were caught with their pants down at a men-only nightclub when detectives burst in on a late-night drug raid.

Sumo World Says 'No Thanks' to Pants
(Reuters)

Sumo World Says 'No Thanks' to Pants
(Reuters) 03/24/2005 11:47 AM
Reuters - A tussle has broken out in Japan's tradition-bound sumo world over the right to wear pants in the ring.

Press button, wipe hands on pants ...
NOT!

Press button, wipe hands on pants ...
NOT! 07/16/2004 05:07 PM
Press button, wipe hands on pants ... NOT! FINALLY someone has done something about those crappy hand driers that never really worked in the first place. I encountered my first XLERATOR in the men's room of my local pool hall the other night. For a moment I feared it would blow the flesh off my tender hands. But no flesh-tearing was to occur; it performed its intended function flawlessly in about 10 seconds. My profound and everlasting gratitude to its inventor. Best news ever? Do I need to get a life?

"Meth Dealer Arrested After Pants
Explode"

"Meth Dealer Arrested After Pants
Explode" 08/04/2004 04:20 AM

Pants war erupts in sumo world (Reuters)

Pants war erupts in sumo world (Reuters) 03/24/2005 04:29 AM
Reuters - A tussle has broken out in Japan's tradition-bound sumo world over the right to wear pants in the ring.

Smarty-Light 2.2.1

Smarty-Light 2.2.1 08/04/2004 11:15 AM
A fast template engine for PHP.

Smarty has a Wiki

Smarty has a Wiki 07/15/2002 01:36 PM
This Wiki is provided to allow the Smarty community (in particular members of the smarty-general mailing list) somewhere to help contribute documentation to the Smarty project. This can include tips, howtos, addons, or answers to frequently asked questions. Useful content added to the Wiki can then be rolled in to the official Smarty documentation later on.

There has been some criticism that the Smarty documentation is more useful to experienced developers than to template designers and end users. This Wiki is here to help change that.

"tri" Smarty is a popular PHP template engine that allows you to separate your code and data. A Wiki is an amazing editing and HTML generation system.

"zeldman.54"

Smarty as a "Sub-Language"

Smarty as a "Sub-Language" 03/22/2005 04:31 PM

I've been spending some time working with Smarty lately. This is ostensibly a "templating language" for PHP. But I think it goes beyond that. I assert that Smarty has become a sub-language all by itself.

(Update: I thought of a much better name for this: "sand-boxed PHP." That's what Smarty is — a sandbox into which you can release as much or as little PHP functionality as you want.)

First of all, for the record, Smarty is astonishingly well-done. Joe tried to get me to use it for about a year, and I resisted because I've hated most templating languages I had worked with. (Lately, Joe is bugging me to try Rails, so I'm sure I'll do that about a year from now. I'm usually about a year behind Joe.)

I've spent just two weeks or so with Smarty, and I'll never, ever go back. It's one of those rare things that was written the way you would have written it if you had all the time in the world and were a lot smarter than you actually are.

What I love about Smarty is the extensibility. You can take any logic and wrap it up into a function or a modifier and expose it to Smarty, so it can be used in templates. Anything — if you can write it in PHP, you can reduce and simplify it down to a tag in Smarty.

This means that you could essentially write a new programming language in Smarty — a language that runs within PHP. Smarty already includes v ariables, flow control, several built-in modifier s and functions, and an i nclude system that's essentially a way to create user-defined functions.

Once you start wrapping up some advanced functionality into Smarty tags, you could create an entire language, teach your template developers how to use it, and they'd never know they were actually using PHP unless you told them. They'd essentially be "programming" in a sub-language that runs inside of PHP. (If they ever ask you what language you're teaching them, just string three letters together — "RTI" or "DBN" or something. They'll buy it.)

Let's consider ColdFusion, which is the language we would come the closest to if we pushed Smarty as far as it could go. This code in ColdFusion pulls a recordset, loops through it, and prints everything out.

<cfquery name="news" datasource="news">
  SELECT * FROM news
</cfquery>

<cfoutput query="news">
  #news.title#
  <br>
</cfoutput>

Now, here's the same thing in a Smarty template:

{query name="news"}
  SELECT * FROM news
{/query}

{foreach from=$news item=article}
  {$article.title}
  <br>
{/foreach}

All this took was a custom, 10-line blo ck function (written like this) that allows the template author to provide the SQL statement to be executed and returns a two-dimensional array. (Before you send the hate mail, yes I know this is wrong. I know this is a perversion of everything Smarty is supposed to do. I'm just trying to make a point here.)

So Smarty can be made to function very much like ColdFusion. It's not hard to take this further. Assign the $_GET and $_POST variables, and you can provide some dynamic functionality. This assignment:

$smarty->assign('_get', $_GET);

Will let you do this in the above template:

{query name="news"}
  SELECT * FROM news WHERE title LIKE '%{$_get.q}%'
{/query}

Now template authors can create a mini-app that searches a database table. It's not hard to see how you could make scripts to let them update tables as well.

But, you may say, Smarty has to be invoked from a PHP page, so the templates cannot be URL-addressable. True, but you can automate this. You can just route all incoming requests to the same PHP page, like this:

AliasMatch ^.*$ /template_loader.php

Then, in that file, do something like this:

$smarty->display($_SERVER['REQUEST_URI']);

This will load whatever template was called in the (fake) URL. So now template authors can start stringing templates together. Before you know it, they've gone and built a simple app. By themselves. Without you. In a language that you gave them. That runs inside of — and is essentially controlled by — PHP.

Your programming environment has now been split into a "main" language and a "sub" language, both of which you have control over. You can give your template authors as much or as little functionality as you want (you "wrote" the language, remember). They can solve as many problems as they can with what you've given them. For other problems, you can tackle them in "real" PHP and just provide the result, or you can encapsulate the algorithm and expose it to Smarty via a function or modifer.

Is this a good thing? I can't decide. But it sure is interesting, ain't it?

Using Smarty: RSS For Every Page

Using Smarty: RSS For Every Page 10/29/2003 01:14 AM
Since all the entry data is stored in a PHP file anyway, and it is parsed out into one form already (XHTML) I figured “What the hell? Why not?” Add ”?rss” to any page on this site for the corresponding...

Smarty for Beginners

Smarty for Beginners 12/28/2003 11:50 PM
Join Hermawan as he shows you the basic of the Smarty templating system.

Codewalkers: Getting Into Smarty

Codewalkers: Getting Into Smarty 12/29/2003 10:59 AM
Once most coders get into the more advances realm of PHP development, they quickly realize that they're going to need some kind of simple system to template the pages of their site. Enter the Smarty template system. And, to get you started with this popular templating engine, Codewalkers.com has a new tutorial to help.

If you've got experience with PHP and
Smarty under ...

If you've got experience with PHP and
Smarty under ... 12/31/2003 07:23 PM

If you've got experience with PHP and Smarty under OS X, I' m having a problem with if()s in the compiled templates. Any suggestions?

2:20 PM | Chris Cummer

Grok Description matches for Mr. Smarty Pants
GrokA matches for Mr. Smarty Pants

Black day as EU fools with place names

Black day as EU fools with place names 04/02/2005 01:00 PM
The Scotsman's contribution to April Fool's yesterday was a satirical bit on Political Correctness: "European bureaucrats will push forward legislation today to force the Scottish Executive to change place-names that offend or discriminate on the grounds of race and gender. The commissioners in Brussels have demanded 'race and gender-sensitive' names found for towns such as Motherwell, Blackburn, Helensburgh, Fort William, Campbeltown, Peterhead, Lewis and Fraserburgh be changed."

Amusing English place-names by post-code

Amusing English place-names by post-code 06/09/2004 01:52 PM
Here's a service that will take your UK post-code and return a list of amusing place-names near to you. Here're the ones near my flat:

Mincing Lane
Cock Pond
Tyttenhanger
Pratt's Bottom
Titsey Park
Minges
Claggy Cott
Herbert's Hole
Nasty
Thong

Link (via Mine, Mine, Mine!)

NetIQ to buy First Place Software

NetIQ to buy First Place Software 04/09/2004 04:06 PM
NetIQ - owners of WebTrends - have announced intentions to purchase First Place Software - owners of WebPosition SEO Software.

Instrinsyc Software International names
Andrew Morden as CFO

Instrinsyc Software International names
Andrew Morden as CFO 09/04/2004 12:25 PM
Canadian Press Sep 4 2004 4:15PM GMT

A Rude Awakening

A Rude Awakening 03/14/2005 06:23 PM

Lib rary Daydreams

“…what I've been daydreaming about is the ability to export a list of books I've checked out so that it could be put on my university website and automatically be updated--sort of like Bloglines maintains my blogroll.  A ‘currently reading’ list on my university website would help communicate my current research interests.  I guess I can do this via allconsuming.net (still need to check out that site, recommended by Mel ear lier), but it would be neat to do it through my own library….

Also, (and this might actually be possible soon, if it isn't already possible) I would LOVE to be able to provide deep links to the library catalog, allowing those who see my "currently reading" list to learn more about each book.  I can do something similar through Amazon , of course, but I'd rather not advertise a for-profit business on my university website.  Plus, the deep links would be handy for course websites, too (e.g., for listing what I've put on reserve for a class).  (Yes, students can get that from the catalog, but it would be handier to deep link.) 

The librarian didn't seem terribly enthusiastic about these ideas.  Apparently, she doesn't blog, heh heh.  Seriously, her lack of enthusiasm stemmed from her abiding concern for patron privacy.

It's so sad that a library has to be more worried about protecting information than sharing information.  I am grateful that my library is attending to the issue, I just think it's sad….” [iBeth, via It’s All Good]

Help me out here… what’s a three-letter abbreviation for something that could help Beth display her list of checked out books?

I’m blanking out….

I just can’t think of it….

Waaaaiiiitttt a minute – could it be… RSS?!

Don’t even get me started on “the librarian didn’t seem terribly enthusiastic about these ideas” part, though. The privacy issue is exactly why ILS vendors should be providing the feeds.

rude postcodes

rude postcodes 06/28/2004 05:59 PM
Rude place names. If you're in England then this is for you. Please bare with us rest of the world, this is what we really like in our humour (at least it in Kilburn). If you're not in England then feel free to use my postcode, NW2. Ooooo, titter ye not (and who will be the first wag to post "not"?)

No more rude awakenings?

No more rude awakenings? 03/28/2005 01:24 PM
Blog: Maybe it has something to do with the imminent arrival of Daylight Savings Time, but alarm clocks have been attracting the...

"Veteran gets rude welcome on
Bainbridge"

"Veteran gets rude welcome on
Bainbridge" 07/10/2004 03:22 PM

Red Sox Give Rodriguez Rude Welcome to
Rivalry

Red Sox Give Rodriguez Rude Welcome to
Rivalry 04/17/2004 01:03 AM
Whether it was nerves or Tim Wakefield's knuckleball, Alex Rodriguez played miserably as the Red Sox stifled the Yankees on Friday night.

China slams "rude" US resolution

China slams "rude" US resolution 06/26/2004 08:04 AM
China reacts angrily to a US Senate resolution calling for greater democracy in Hong Kong.

Apple financials rude with health

Apple financials rude with health 04/13/2005 05:50 PM
Margins up, too

vbRad.com Names Mozilla Firefox Find As
You Type Top Software Innovation of 2004

vbRad.com Names Mozilla Firefox Find As
You Type Top Software Innovation of 2004 12/24/2004 01:15 PM

Install Software on Multiple PCs, Make
Icons Stay in Place, Remove Add/Remove
Programs Entries

Install Software on Multiple PCs, Make
Icons Stay in Place, Remove Add/Remove
Programs Entries 09/13/2004 11:52 PM
G4 Tech TV Sep 14 2004 3:28AM GMT

"the Rude Pundit's suggestions for what
John Edwards should say"

"the Rude Pundit's suggestions for what
John Edwards should say" 10/07/2004 04:15 PM

New York Daily News - Home - They're
nude, they're rude

New York Daily News - Home - They're
nude, they're rude 08/27/2004 05:26 PM
NY Daily Nudes: This IS the naked city .. Some are wacky and wild

nydailynews.com/front/story/226336p-194391c.html
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"THE BOOS THAT ROCKED THE VOTE: KERRY
DAUGHTERS RECEIVE RUDE AWAKENING AT MTV
AWARDS "

"THE BOOS THAT ROCKED THE VOTE: KERRY
DAUGHTERS RECEIVE RUDE AWAKENING AT MTV
AWARDS " 08/30/2004 03:46 PM

This Derby Will Be Won by a Bird

This Derby Will Be Won by a Bird 06/21/2004 08:23 PM
This week, more than 12 young albatrosses will soar into the homestretch of what might be called the Big Bird version of the Belmont Stakes.

In the Derby, Only One Horse Will Say No

In the Derby, Only One Horse Will Say No 04/28/2004 03:54 PM
Trainer Patrick Biancone's decision to stay away from a medication underlines how the use of a drug has become a key dynamic in America's greatest horse race.

Football: Leeds 1-0 Derby

Football: Leeds 1-0 Derby 08/07/2004 08:48 AM
Frazer Richardson's second-half goal gives Leeds an opening-day win against Derby.

Motorola names Zander chairman;
Berlusconi bill nixed; American Electric
Power names Morris CEO

Motorola names Zander chairman;
Berlusconi bill nixed; American Electric
Power names Morris CEO 12/16/2003 02:59 PM
Forbes Dec 16 2003 1:34PM ET

Morning After Is No Problem for Derby
Winner

Morning After Is No Problem for Derby
Winner 05/03/2004 12:34 PM
Smarty Jones appears to have come out of his rousing victory in Saturday's Kentucky Derby as good as he was going into the race.

AP: Derby Winner Didn't Disclose Record
(AP)

AP: Derby Winner Didn't Disclose Record
(AP) 05/07/2004 05:57 PM
AP - Kentucky Derby winning jockey Stewart Elliott pleaded guilty to assault three years ago, but didn't disclose the information when applying for a license to ride at Churchill Downs.

Derby Source Code Released

Derby Source Code Released 09/21/2004 03:13 PM
Slashdot Sep 21 2004 5:57PM GMT

Churchill Downs' Derby Dollars

Churchill Downs' Derby Dollars 05/03/2004 11:37 PM
The racetrack owner enjoys record wagering at this year's Kentucky Derby.

Kentucky Derby to Set Position Order
(AP)

Kentucky Derby to Set Position Order
(AP) 04/28/2004 03:49 PM
AP - It's been quite an ordeal for the New York trainer who fondly calls Louisville his second home, but Nick Zito is back in the Kentucky Derby business. He will saddle Grade 1 stakes winners The Cliff's Edge and Birdstone in Saturday's race, with either quite capable of winning.

Wimbledon Scratched From Kentucky Derby
(AP)

Wimbledon Scratched From Kentucky Derby
(AP) 04/30/2004 07:50 AM
AP - Bob Baffert's Kentucky Derby hopes were dashed Friday when Wimbledon was scratched because of swelling in his left front leg.

IBM backs up Cloudscape/Derby database
with new support

IBM backs up Cloudscape/Derby database
with new support 08/31/2004 05:50 AM
IBM is busy trying to build yet another new developer community -- one to coalesce around its low-end, Java-based Cloudscape relational database and its open source clone, Derby.

Racing: North Light wins Derby

Racing: North Light wins Derby 06/05/2004 10:37 AM
North Light wins the Vodafone Derby to give champion jockey Kieren Fallon a Classic double.

Smarty Jones Wins Kentucky Derby (AP)

Smarty Jones Wins Kentucky Derby (AP) 05/01/2004 09:30 PM
AP - Here we go again. A nice but hardly heralded horse wins the Kentucky Derby. That's what happened last year with Funny Cide, and it happened again Saturday with Smarty Jones.

Derby to pay Capita GBP11.25m to roll
out e-government

Derby to pay Capita GBP11.25m to roll
out e-government 07/23/2004 03:08 AM
Silicon.com Jul 23 2004 7:49AM GMT

Mr. Smarty Pants

The following phrases have been identified by the grok system as matching this entry: medact software tutorial "rude place names" derby