not a joke

Grok Headline matches for not a joke

LGA 775: A Joke And A Threat That Is No
Joke.

LGA 775: A Joke And A Threat That Is No
Joke. 06/21/2004 10:18 PM
Overclockers.com: LGA 775: A Joke And A Threat That Is No Joke. "This is a threat, the biggest threat we've ever faced. If you wait until it becomes reality, it's too late to do anything about it." Awwww.

A Joke

A Joke 02/20/2003 10:05 PM
Did you here that the Walmarts and K-Marts are closing down in the Middle East? Apparently they're all becoming Targets. (rimshot)

PepsiCo No Joke

PepsiCo No Joke 04/15/2004 02:28 PM
PepsiCo continues to perform, but may be fairly valued.

What's the Best Geek Joke You Know?

What's the Best Geek Joke You Know? 06/24/2005 05:44 PM
Slashdot Jun 24 2005 12:27AM GMT

Remix of W's WMD joke

Remix of W's WMD joke 04/10/2004 07:14 PM
This remix of George W's WMD joke at the White House Correspondants' Dinner is vicious, brilliant and true. 3. 6MB QuickTime Link (via Dan Gillmor)

Panda Joke VI

Panda Joke VI 03/17/2005 03:31 AM
Back again for the sixth consecutive year, it's the Panda Joke! A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you...

Panda Joke V

Panda Joke V 04/09/2004 04:09 PM
One of this site's annual traditions is that I post the Panda Joke each year when I'm away for SXSW....

Math Joke

Math Joke 04/09/2004 03:56 PM

I just got this via email and don't know the copyright or the origin of this. If someone knows whether I should give credit to someone, please let me know. But it's too funny not to blog.

PHP Humor ... No that's *Not* a Joke
Itself

PHP Humor ... No that's *Not* a Joke
Itself 03/21/2003 09:12 AM

PHP Humor ...  No that's *Not* a Joke Itself

PHP-Con is doing humorous interviews with some of the speakers to promote the event.  Here's the one with John Coggeshall:

When was your first PHP?

John Coggeshall: Sitting in a darkened smoke filled room... I was almost out of money but a friend of mine told me she [PHP] was good for a trick or two and didn't charge much.

His comments on Perl, Java, and Visual Basic are really good.  You can read more of this over at the PHP- Con site.

.Net is a Joke (Allegedly)

.Net is a Joke (Allegedly) 03/19/2003 10:26 PM

For Sun , Microsoft Settlement Is No
Joke

For Sun , Microsoft Settlement Is No
Joke 04/19/2004 11:03 AM
We may miss Scott McNealy's jabs at Microsoft, but the money from the recent settlement will inject new life into Sun, which badly needs a transfusion. Many of us are just now coming to grips with the most serious implication of the April 2 settlement between Sun and Microsoft: Scott McNealy's keynote speeches just got a lot duller. The Sun CEO has made a career of his stand-up routine over the years, entertaining thousands with such classic zingers as calling Windows the "giant hairball"; Active Directory, "Captive Directory"; and .Net, "Dot Not" or "Not Yet." And, in case of computer crashes, "Call 1-800-CTL-ALT-DEL."

Oracle v. Peoplesoft: the joke is on...

Oracle v. Peoplesoft: the joke is on... 09/20/2004 05:12 AM
Opinion Cash from chaos

Safer Smoke a Joke?

Safer Smoke a Joke? 06/02/2004 11:52 AM
A fire-safe cigarette for New York may roll over the rest of the country, too.

Press reveal for joke!

Press reveal for joke! 06/21/2004 12:38 PM
The Ceefax teletext service is essentially the same now as when the BBC developed it in 19 73, and is still used across Europe. Absurd, outmoded and wonderfully British, old bean.

We can finally joke about beheadings...

We can finally joke about beheadings... 07/13/2004 01:39 AM
The kidnap videos in Iraq are suspicious. Some say they are fake. Some make their own... what do you think of this one? A rare bit of humor from Al-Jazeera. [.wmv]

Google maths joke

Google maths joke 09/15/2004 05:03 PM
New Scientist Sep 15 2004 7:51PM GMT

Obscure Finnish joke

Obscure Finnish joke 02/01/2005 09:48 PM
Siinä tulevaisuus. :D

Joke-e-oke Makes You a Comedian

Joke-e-oke Makes You a Comedian 03/24/2005 07:38 PM

Not An April Fool’s Joke

Not An April Fool’s Joke 04/01/2005 05:24 PM
Just foolishness. The XML Binary Characterization Working Group has issued their f inal report which recommends (surprise, surprise) that the W3C produce a “Binary XML” specification. Elliotte Rusty Harold nails it. I don’t care if anyone wants to go off and produce their own data interchange format, binary or not, open or not, standardized or not, mapped to XML or not; as long as they don’t call it XML. “Binary XML” is an oxymoron. And I should point out that the people at Sun who are building a binary data format with a mapping to XML are calling it something else entirely. These Binary-XML people are charging headlong onto the top of a very long, very steep, very slippery slope. [Update: Further joy. I see that this poorly-labelled table asserts that XML prevents both “processing efficiency” and “forward compatibility”. Glad to hear it.]

Companies Who Can't Take A Joke, But Can
Push A Lie

Companies Who Can't Take A Joke, But Can
Push A Lie 02/12/2004 02:16 PM
It's no secret that, on the internet, if you don't like something and try to get it taken down, you're only going to draw a lot more attention to it. However, corporations still haven't gotten this message. They seem to get especially annoyed at parodies, complaining that people might be tricked by them. Here's an article that takes these companies to task for not being able to take a joke, while at the same time having so-called "independent" organizations that are paid by them set up advocacy websites that are nothing more than a front for the company or group in question. In other words, companies get upset about advocacy that goes against them and try to force the sites down, worrying that people will get "confused." At the same time, they're hiding the fact that they're behind these other advocacy sites (which, some might say is confusing readers, as well). As the writer of the article points out, even if they're right, they're doing themselves harm by not being upfront and honest about these sites: "The more successful the strategy in the short term, the more it will eventually corrode trust in the long. People persuaded by such sites will feel betrayed when it becomes evident they were duped. And it won't even matter if the pseudo sites have truth on their side: when a messenger is exposed as an impostor, their credibility is destroyed." Another example of short-term thinking from corporations that do them much more damage in the long term.

Nautical Geek Joke

Nautical Geek Joke 01/22/2004 03:04 AM
As previously noted, I subscribed to The Gunroom, the online home of Patrick O’Brian fanciers; in the first day there have been two not-bad jokes. This one concerns a pirate’s parrot who got a bad case of sunstroke and was heard crowing Pieces of seven, pieces of seven. Which was clearly a parroty error.

Stupid language joke

Stupid language joke 02/10/2004 02:55 AM
The funniness of an US company called Makkara Sushi combined with this this scientific experiment is left as an exercise to the reader.

Up to 15 Years in Jail for Joke

Up to 15 Years in Jail for Joke 01/24/2004 01:45 PM
Samantha Marson, a 21 year old woman from Britain, was jailed in Miami after making a joke to an American customs official. The joke: "Hey be careful, I have three bombs in here," she quipped, as her carry-on luggage was screened.

Woman Jailed After Joke About Robbery
(AP)

Woman Jailed After Joke About Robbery
(AP) 01/07/2004 03:06 PM
AP - A grandmother jokingly demanded money from a bank teller — and ended up spending the night in jail.

More Trouble For The Great Broadband
Joke

More Trouble For The Great Broadband
Joke 06/29/2004 05:30 PM
For many, many years, there have been stories about broadband over powerlines. Every few years it seems to make a big comeback... in the press. The press loves the idea, but when it comes down to the actual technology it never gets very far. Trials get announced, and then quickly fade away. Even though Michael Powell has declared it the "great broadband hope," once again, trials are ending early, as the technology is proving to be problematic. As this article notes, fixing those technology problems "may clash with the concept of making a profit." Broadband over powerlines is looking like yet another "technology of the future... that always will be." It may be time to put it away for a few more years until some new reporters pick it up around 2007.

Is It Still Satire If You Can Find
Someone Who Missed The Joke?

Is It Still Satire If You Can Find
Someone Who Missed The Joke? 12/24/2003 12:08 PM
As expected, it's shaping up to be something of a slow news day, but there are still a few good stories out there. This one, found over at Tech Law Advisor shows why people without a sense of humor shouldn't be allowed to hire (or be) lawyers. A few years back, after a judge ordered the detention of a 13-year-old kid for handing in a school essay with a "violent tone", the Dallas Observer wrote up a satire piece about the same folks having a 6-year-old arrested for writing a book report on Maurice Sendak's insanely popular children's book "Where the Wild Things Are." In the article, they made up ridiculous quotes ("We've considered having her certified to stand trial as an adult, but even in Texas there are some limits." and "Any implication of violence in a school situation, even if it was just contained in a first-grader's book report, is reason enough for panic and overreaction.") and attributed them to real people who were involved in the original case. Those people are now suing for libel. Of course, satire and opinion are protected speech, but the people in question are claiming that because some people don't have a sense of humor and missed the satire, it's not satire at all. If that argument stood, then all you would need to do to unprotect satire is find someone with no sense of humor who missed the joke - and rush them to the courthouse to have them help you file your lawsuit. Meanwhile, it seems like the judges are realizing that this case is pointless. Yet more evidence that we live in a society where if anyone says anything you don't want to hear, you sue first and act offended later.

Insert Homer Simpson joke here

Insert Homer Simpson joke here 09/09/2004 12:03 AM
"Max Power Aerospace is offering Boeing aircraft reused as private residences.  ... The aircraft are mounted on a steel column and bearing so the whole airplane weathervanes, pointing into the wind." For more information, read the Aircraft Home Owner's Flight Manual. (Bikini girl not included, presumably.)

Remixing Bush's tasteless joke.

Remixing Bush's tasteless joke. 04/11/2004 09:20 AM
Remixing Bush's tasteless joke. Has some graphic images.

Welcome to South Park: a job opening (no
joke)

Welcome to South Park: a job opening (no
joke) 12/13/2003 08:43 PM
Ages ago we interviewed the South Park system admins to get an idea of what kind of technology was behind the show.

Corporations that miss the joke and just
repeat the lie

Corporations that miss the joke and just
repeat the lie 02/12/2004 12:35 PM
newmediazero Feb 12 2004 5:06PM GMT

Tax Official Suspended Over Tax Form
Joke (AP)

Tax Official Suspended Over Tax Form
Joke (AP) 02/07/2005 01:29 AM
AP - The city's tax superintendent has been suspended without pay for a week for trying to inject some humor in the city income tax filing instructions.

Did you hear the joke about the pencil?
Its pointless.

Did you hear the joke about the pencil?
Its pointless. 02/18/2004 02:48 PM
The Pencil Pages :: An Introduction to Pencils and Pencil Collecting
with gallery, pencil geek humor, pencil trivia, and much more

"George W. Bush "G.I. Joke" Action
Figure"

"George W. Bush "G.I. Joke" Action
Figure" 12/10/2003 10:15 PM

The George W. Bush G.I. Joke Action
Figure

The George W. Bush G.I. Joke Action
Figure 12/09/2003 07:22 AM
Mad Magazine gets pissed off .. become satirical

www2.warnerbros.com/madmagazine/files/onthestands/ots_437/ 6.html
track this site | 4 links

Joke e-mail virus tricks users

Joke e-mail virus tricks users 06/06/2005 12:07 AM
News.bbc.co.uk - Wed Jun 1, 06:32 pm GMT

Sen. Candidate Adds Joke Writer to Staff
(AP)

Sen. Candidate Adds Joke Writer to Staff
(AP) 05/31/2004 10:01 AM
AP - Roy Teicher made it big in the other Hollywood as a joke writer for "The Tonight Show," "Newhart," "Mork & Mindy" and other sitcoms and movies. Now in the city with the same name on the other coast, he's going after an audience that's a little different — Florida voters.

Linus Torvalds: Sun Microsystems'
Solaris a "joke"

Linus Torvalds: Sun Microsystems'
Solaris a "joke" 12/22/2004 01:48 AM
When Linus Torvalds successfully harnessed the talent of thousands of programmers to create Linux, the operating system that arguably suffered most was Sun Microsystems' Solaris. Now Torvalds and his allies face a new side of that old competitor. Sun has turned Solaris into an open-source project. The company also is building its own community of programmers around Solaris, while promoting the operating system's deployment on the widely used computers with x86 processors, such as Intel's Xeon. But the 34-year-old Finnish programmer isn't fazed by Solaris. In fact, he's downright dismissive, calling it a "joke."

Joke Email Forward! Fire the Bastard!

Joke Email Forward! Fire the Bastard! 05/01/2004 07:41 AM
Last week, according to today's Boston Globe (link breaks soon), Major General George W. Keefe of the National Guard received and forwarded a gag email about the Democratic convention that purported to be a schedule of events: "Opening flag burning ceremony," a re-enactment of Kerry's Tossing of the Medals, and "Sen. Kennedy proposes a toast" (six times). Ok, so maybe it's not the funniest gag email you've ever seen. But Keefe felt forced to apologize for forwarding it after Mayor Mumbles Menino fulminated against it: "It's unfortunate that an adjutant general of the National Guard has the time on...

Bush Joke Video: DC Humor in Bad Taste |
MFA

Bush Joke Video: DC Humor in Bad Taste |
MFA 04/11/2004 06:56 AM
rejoinder to President Bush's jokes .. brutally honest remix .. 3.6MB QuickTime Link

musicforamerica.org/bushjoke
track this site | 4 links

Grok Description matches for not a joke
GrokA matches for not a joke

Naturellement, the Aristocrats.

Naturellement, the Aristocrats. 06/08/2004 01:26 AM
South Park does the "Aristocrats" joke. (WARNING! Windows Media file, very very not safe for work.) "The Aristocrats" is a long-lived comedians' in-joke--or, rather, an extraordinarily filthy joke that's not really a joke. (Gilbert Gottfried knocked 'em dead with it shortly after 9/11.) Now it's going public (sort of): Penn Jillette and Paul Provenza are making a movie featuring over 100 comedians telling their own versions. The South Park version linked above is "not even in the top 5 for dirtiest." Yikes!

ESPN's accidentally dirtiest homoerotic
web headline EVER

ESPN's accidentally dirtiest homoerotic
web headline EVER 07/28/2004 06:26 PM
"Rangers Take Whiff of Angel's Colon." Fantasy baseball, indeed. Link

The New Yorker: Shouts and Murmurs

The New Yorker: Shouts and Murmurs 07/19/2004 06:22 PM
As a quick-thinking senatorial aide switched on the Senate��s public-address system and cued up the infamous ��Seven Minutes of Funk�� break, Mr. Leahy and Mr. Cheney went head-to-head in what can only be described as a ��take no prisoners�� freesty

newyorker.com/shouts/content/?040726sh_shouts
track this site | 5 links

Sun shouts at analysts with customer
wins

Sun shouts at analysts with customer
wins 10/29/2003 07:09 PM
Have you seen our momentum

Yahoo shouts of success despite
competition

Yahoo shouts of success despite
competition 12/26/2004 11:21 AM
Chicago Tribune Dec 26 2004 2:22PM GMT

not a joke

The following phrases have been identified by the grok system as matching this entry: dirtiest joke shouts out, "the aristocrats!"